Show HN: We built an open source, zero webhooks payment processor

Flowglad hit Hacker News promising “zero webhooks” and a sane way to handle pricing and feature access, and the crowd instantly split into two camps: the “finally, fewer moving parts” fans and the “marketing hype, where’s the card processor?” skeptics. The pitch: one place to read a customer’s billing state, no messy event listeners, and real‑time feature gating. Translation for non‑devs: fewer brittle “did we get the billing email?” moments. But the comments lit up. clintonb side‑eyed the scare‑stats—“250+ Stripe events”—with a cool “you don’t need them all,” while aftbit asked the big question: does Flowglad actually charge cards, or do you still need Stripe or Braintree? Cue koakuma‑chan reminding everyone the real boss level is Visa/Mastercard rules, not webhook spam. Then baobabKoodaa dropped the hammer: it’s not a Stripe replacement, it’s an abstraction layer on top. The pricing line “2.9% + 30¢” sparked immediate wallet panic; swedishuser called it “Very expensive!” and the thread turned into a group therapy session about fees. Meanwhile, fans cheered the “use your own IDs” and quick Next.js/React setup, joking that Flowglad is “couples therapy for devs and billing.” Memes flew: “zero webhooks = zero headaches,” retorted by “zero webhooks = zero actual payments?” Classic HN energy—optimism vs reality check, with a side of fee rage.