December 6, 2025

Laptops Named Like Wi‑Fi Passwords

Bikeshedding, or why I want to build a laptop

Dream laptop rant ignites HP name roast and “PCs still chasing Apple” brawl

TLDR: A blogger dreams of a MacBook running Linux and slams Apple’s closed parts, Framework’s modular vibe, and HP’s chaotic names. Comments explode with HP jokes, tips for System76/Framework, and a fiery debate over upgradability—plus a big gripe that PCs still haven’t matched Apple’s M‑series power and battery.

A laptop lover wants the impossible: a MacBook that runs Linux, minus Apple’s locked-down parts and mystery chips. He trashes Apple’s recent vibe, says Linux on Mac hits walls, and shrugs at Framework upgradability—he wants a glued‑together, ultra‑polished brick. Cue the crowd going full popcorn. One camp cheers the ethos of parts you can swap; another says, “Nope, give me one perfect machine.” Meanwhile, the whole thread dunks on HP’s alphabet‑soup names—“ZBook Firefly G11” got meme’d into a Wi‑Fi password. Commenters point him toward System76 and Framework, while a spicy chorus laments that five years after Apple’s M1 chip, Windows laptops still feel behind on speed and battery. The author’s gripes get specific—no easy way to plug a monitor via USB‑C (that’s “DP Alt Mode”) and poor power use on Linux—so the replies split: some say Apple’s secrecy makes this a dead end, others argue open, swappable parts are the only way forward. Strongest takes? “PC laptops are embarrassing,” “x86 chips still sip power like it’s 2010,” and “HP, please stop naming products like a car dealership.” It’s classic bikeshedding, but the stakes feel real: power, polish, and a laptop that doesn’t fight you back. Read the comments for the real show.

Key Points

  • The article explores running Linux on MacBook hardware via Asahi Linux and identifies current limitations, including missing DisplayPort Alt Mode for USB-C external monitors.
  • It attributes difficulties to Apple’s undocumented custom hardware and microcontrollers, affecting USB port control and power management on Linux.
  • The author prefers a non-upgradable, single-configuration laptop design over modular/upgradable options like those from Framework.
  • Framework Laptop 16 is noted as using AMD Strix Point instead of Strix Halo, and performance expectations are compared against Apple’s M3 Max.
  • The author currently uses an HP ZBook Ultra G1a 14 and criticizes HP’s complex, multi-brand laptop naming scheme.

Hottest takes

“Utterly dumb marketing strategies.” — SilverElfin
“there are no good x86 cpus with good power effciciency.” — fruitworks
“the whole pc laptop industry really is an embarrassment right now.” — doublextremevil
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