February 4, 2026

Grab your forks—this roast is sizzling

Why This Computer Scientist Says All Cryptocurrency Should "Die in a Fire"

Berkeley prof torches crypto; commenters bring marshmallows

TLDR: A Berkeley researcher says crypto is harmful and should “die in a fire,” as markets wobble and hype fades. The comments mostly pile on with jokes about pizza trades and volatility, minimal pushback, and a shared vibe that crypto isn’t working for everyday payments—making this a must‑watch internet bonfire.

A UC‑Berkeley computer scientist just lit up the internet by saying all cryptocurrency should “die in a fire,” and the comments arrived like it was s’mores night. Nicholas Weaver, a longtime crypto skeptic, calls it a “virus” that fuels crime, burns electricity, and dupes regular folks—an especially spicy take as even the New York Times says the market is in full‑on meltdown. He even drops a Star Trek gag about “quatloos” to underline how make‑believe it all feels.

The crowd? Mostly cheering. One user deadpans “they’re not wrong,” another chants “It will. Oh it will,” like they’re tossing logs on the blaze. The thread’s star joke is the pizza meme: crypto should’ve stayed a nerdy stunt for trading lunch, says one commenter, echoing the infamous “Bitcoin pizza” story. Others break it down in simple terms: you never actually buy a $5 coffee in bitcoin—you buy the dollar value in bitcoin, which swings wildly, so it’s a headache at the checkout.

There’s drama, but not much defending. In this corner of the internet, the mood is roast the coins, not the marshmallows. One laconic post—just “(2022)”—reads like a mic‑drop about how weird this year is for crypto. Weaver’s verdict is brutal, the crowd’s snark is sharper, and for once, the comments might be hotter than the take itself.

Key Points

  • Nicholas Weaver, a researcher at ICSI and lecturer at UC Berkeley, is interviewed by Current Affairs about his longstanding critique of cryptocurrency.
  • Weaver’s 2018 assessment labeled cryptocurrencies as not fit for purpose, citing inefficiency, failure as currencies, and inadequate trust distribution.
  • He outlines four categories of crypto risks: technical, economic, systemic (to the crypto ecosystem), and societal.
  • In a 2022 YouTube lecture, Weaver called cryptocurrency a “virus” enabling criminal enterprises and securities fraud, urging avoidance.
  • Weaver explains crypto’s intended design (peer-to-peer payments without intermediaries), the use of a pseudonymous public ledger, and mining’s energy cost to secure transactions, contrasting it with traditional payment systems like PayPal, M-Pesa, Visa, and wire transfers.

Hottest takes

“should have stayed a silly tech demo that nerds used to trade… for pizza” — izzydata
“Instead of $5 you pay the current trading value of $5 in bitcoin” — BadBadJellyBean
“It will. Oh it will.” — profsummergig
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