Having Kids (2019)

From “no thanks” to “best gift ever”—and one dad’s AI job panic

TLDR: An essayist admits parenthood went from dreaded to deeply joyful once he had kids, crediting a perspective shift. The comments echo with “kids are a gift” enthusiasm, tempered by one standout thread of modern fear: raising a family feels priceless—unless AI kills the paycheck, and that tension stole the spotlight.

A writer who once thought parents were “uncool” confesses he flipped from “better you than me” to full-on baby bliss the minute his first child arrived—calling it a switch-flip of love and peace. Cue the comments: a full-on lovefest with a side of tech doom. One camp is shouting that kids are a “gift” you can’t explain till you’re in it, and yes, multiple parents flexed their “best decision ever” status—twice, thrice, take a bow. Another voice adds nuance: “It’s not for everyone,” but for them it’s the best thing they’ve done, period.

Then the plot twist: a dad drops a gut-punch of AI anxiety, fearing layoffs and bills, turning a warm-and-fuzzy thread into a modern-parent reality check. Suddenly it’s baby giggles vs. robot takeovers, and everyone’s feeling the whiplash. Commenters bonded over the essay’s confession about selection bias—we only notice kids when they’re scream-crying on airplanes—and turned it into a meme: “Judge parents by airport chaos, get airport chaos.” Others riffed on the author’s cheeky “parenthood is a cult” line, joking that the initiation ritual is stepping on Legos at 3 a.m.

Net vibe: hearts warmed, eyes misty, with a chorus of parents swearing the everyday moments—bedtime chats, park swings—beat any former life. But lurking in the stroller’s shadow? The fear of tomorrow’s paycheck.

Key Points

  • The author initially viewed parents as uncool and parenthood as undesirable, despite expecting to have children eventually.
  • After the birth of his first child, he experienced immediate protective feelings and a positive shift toward children in general.
  • He identifies selection bias in his pre-parenthood observations, noticing children mainly during stressful, public disruptions like flights.
  • Parenthood provides frequent, quiet moments of peace and fulfillment that he previously overlooked.
  • Memories of his own troublesome childhood led him to view parenting as law enforcement, a view later corrected by positive experiences and his mother’s perspective.

Hottest takes

"Having kids is a gift" — yanis_t
"nothing is more satisfying than raising kids" — meitham
"so scared of losing my job in tech due to ai" — dominotw
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