June 3, 2026
From church van to crime plan
Sixteen Kids and a Hit Man (2024)
Microsoft dad of 16 lived a church-family dream — and allegedly went hunting for a killer online
TLDR: A Microsoft systems engineer and father of 16, known for a deeply religious family life, is accused of trying to hire a hit man online. The community reaction is dominated by disbelief at the huge gap between his wholesome image and the horrifying allegations, which is exactly why the story feels so shocking.
The article reads like a true-crime fever dream, and the community response is basically: how does a man with 16 kids, a big churchgoing family, and a steady Microsoft job end up allegedly browsing the darkest corners of the internet for a contract killing? Readers are fixated on the jaw-dropping contrast. On paper, Christopher Pence looked like the poster dad for wholesome family life: Christian rock, greenhouses, cows, church van, desert home. Then comes the plot twist that sounds too wild for fiction — prosecutors say he used a privacy-focused system and the dark web to try to hire a hit man.
With only one discussion reply linked — sameers’s archive link — the mood is less meme-flood and more stunned rubbernecking. The strongest reaction is sheer disbelief at the split-screen life here: respectable suburban provider by day, alleged murder-for-hire shopper by night. That tension is the real gasoline in the comments atmosphere surrounding stories like this, because people can’t resist gawking at the gap between the polished public image and the alleged private plan. The dark humor practically writes itself: a household big enough for a minibus, dreams of farm life, and then a criminal scheme that sounds ripped from a cheap thriller. The unspoken hot take hanging over everything is brutal but simple: sometimes the most shocking stories are the ones starring the last person anyone expected.
Key Points
- •The article says Christopher Pence used the privacy-focused Tails operating system in summer 2021 to access the dark web from his home office in Cedar City, Utah.
- •According to the article, Pence wanted to hire a hit man to kill a young couple he had met only a handful of times.
- •Pence is described as a 41-year-old Microsoft systems engineer with no criminal record and no known history of violence.
- •The article says Pence and his wife, Michelle, were raising 11 biological children and five adopted children, while living with his retired parents.
- •The family is portrayed as Evangelical Christians living near the Mojave Desert, building greenhouses, planning to buy cows, and attending Valley Bible Church.